Word on the street is that Mark Cuban wants to buy the Chicago Cubs for $1.3 billion. It’s most likely enough money, but the question is, will the MLB allow him to be the buyer?

So the Dallas Mavericks’ owner is a little, shall we say unconventional. He’s a fan-owner. He drinks beer and wears jeans and cheers for his team at games. He’d most likely do the same in the outfield bleachers of Wrigley Field, rather than wear a suit and tie and sit in the press box a la George Steinbrenner in the Bronx.

Whether or not Cuban is allowed purchase the team is out of our jurisdiction. What we at TSC can do, however, is give him a few suggestions for what to do with the club when and if he ever owns it.

1. Don’ t mess with Wrigley. For the sake of tradition, please don’t change the name of Wrigley Field. Along with Yankee Stadium and Fenway Park, it’s in the top three MLB stadiums of all time, historically. Same thing goes for the ivy along the outfield wall. Allowing advertisers to promote their products on the wall was bad enough.

2. Replace crappy celebrities with professional singers during the seventh-inning stretch.Seriously. And when we say professional singers, that doesn’t mean Ozzie Osborn. Rich does not equal professional.

3. Have a public execution of a goat, then win the World Series.It would be a pretty impressive way of getting rid of the curse of the goat. But make sure your team is gonna win it all, though. It you kill a goat to get rid of the team’s curse and then it doesn’t work, PETA’s gonna come after your ass like you were Michael Vick’s kin.