Just in the nick of time for college football season, the fine folks at HideYourBooze.com have now given millions of college coeds the ability to maintain a steady buzz throughout the entire game.

Traditional pregaming methods required the human body to absorb borderline-alcohol-poising levels of booze just to stay drunk ’til halftime. True story: at last year’s Homecoming game, a guy standing behind me passed out in the first quarter, only to awake in the fourth just moments before students began rushing the field. That’s just one instance of the many side affects from awakening up at 8 a.m. to multiple beer bongs.

So in light of the NCAA’s new rules that keep making games longer (this year, a 40-second play clock), HideYourBooze.com has a handful of secretive devices to keep your drank strong during the entire game. Girls: no longer is a 15-shot Bacardi 151 pregame sesh required.

Beernoculars: Absolutely brilliant. Sure, opening kickoff is near, but don’t fear their one-day shipping. Probably the least detectable out of their product line.

Booze book: Granted, a college football environment isn’t an optimal situation, but students can pull it off like they just rolled up from a library study sesh.

We just ordered the Beernoculars, and will certainly blog about Saturday’s experience.