Anytime you’ve got the following ingredients:

• A three-stadium tour in three days
• The Casino
• The Rose Bowl
• Booze
• Los Angeles
• Good friends

You’ve got a recipe for the obligatory Great American Bill Simmons Road Trip Running Diary. Yes, we’re about to embark on grand 14-hour round trip from Phoenix to LA — I’ll cut that in half when driving — and bring you Lots Of References Through Titles Like This That Pretty Much Explain Themselves through this dear sports blog.

Behold