Oh giggidy!
Looks like Tiger Woods took our advice.
When he announced he was going to take some time off to have surgery and rehab, we made a list of what he should do to occupy his time. No. 2 was “Make sweet, sweet love to his wife, Elin Nordegren, a former Swedish model.”
Woods announced yesterday through his Web site that his wife is pregos with their second child.
“Elin is feeling great and we are both thrilled,” Woods said. “While my injury has been disappointing and frustrating, it has allowed me to spend a lot of time watching Sam grow. I can’t begin to tell you how rewarding it is being a dad and spending time with her and Elin.
“The injury has been a blessing and a disappointment.“
That’s what we’d like to call a hole in one.
Fashion designer Giorgio Armani has a lot in common with Tiger Woods.
They’re both rich beyond rich.
They both own their own yacht. Tiger’s is named Privacy. Giorgio’s is named Main.
And apparently they both dig black Nike caps.
The biggest difference between these two pictures, however, is that Armani looks like he can still give the ladies a run for their money, if you know what we mean. The man just turned 74 a couple weeks ago and he’s still hung like a redneck’s Christmas lights in July.
We’ll go ahead and call this, er, cock fight a draw, though. After all, Tiger is married to a Swedish model.
How good of a tennis player is Andy Roddick?
Well, he beat a dude with a frying pan once. And if you follow the rules of this ESPN.com contest, you too can have the chance to be humiliated by Roddick and his cooking utensil.
If we may, TSC has some ideas along the same line of anchoring down a professional athlete with a “tool” outside of traditional sports, setting him up against Joe Schmoe and, in turn, absolutely making Joe feel like the most worthless piece of shit on Earth if the athlete wins.
1. Home run derby against future home run king Alex Rodriguez where he must use a 2×4 piece of wood. But knowing A-Rod, he’ll just skip the event so he won’t screw up his swing.
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The magical, poisoned apple that put Tiger Woods in a coma for the rest of the 2008 PGA season, was purchased on e-Bay for $716.66 by Rotohog, a fantasy sports company.
After they won the online auction, the goofballs at Rotohog met with the two men who picked up the apple, which Tiger had allegedly thrown, at the 108th U.S. Open. The two men told their story on camera, which will be released online within the next couple of days.
And just like Marc Ecko did with Barry Bonds’ No. 756 home run ball, the Rotohog fellas are asking the public to vote on what should be done with the apple core.
Here are the choices:
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Though hilarious, you’ve gotta think that this comic is completely bogus. Tiger can’t get past a windmill? After he whooped Bob Barker’s ass and beat the nose off of the clown in the putt-putt park, even Happy Gilmore learned to get through the windmill.
This gives us an idea. If Happy Gilmore can putt on a mini course better than a hand-drawn Tiger Woods, what else does he have on him?
We’ll tell you. Introducing TSC’s tale of the tape: Tiger Woods vs. Happy Gilmore. Click the jump for a complete comparison.
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