She enjoys water. Michael Phelps dominates water. She enjoys getting dominated by Michael Phelps.

Since the second that man emerged from the Beijing pool, everybody knew The Michael Phelps Victory Lap would entail more than just a lap in the pool.

Apparently when someone wins eight gold metals, you’re entitled to a Tiger Woods-level of glory and fame. In term comes the jersey speedo chasers.

Caroline “Caz” Pal is the lucky gal to wife up the “girlfriend” role from Michael Phelps.

She’s a cocktail waitress in Las Vegas. And as if that doesn’t spell “freak in bed” enough, she’s got a tramp stamp that’s more like a tramp mural.

The fine folks at Gunaxin have, yet another, very dynamic gallery of Miss Michael Phelps.

She kinda has that Asian pursuasian — maybe she’s a Beijing acquisition.

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John Daly must love our network. First sports. Then alcohol. Now, sex!

Just in time for final exams and the mistletoe season, Red Cup Media has launched its latest masterpiece:
College & Sex.

Our very own well-established sex columnist brings a wealth of sex & relationship material for all college students. Her witty yet simple style of writing is sure to arouse your web browser, so log on to http://www.collegeandsex.com for everything from blowjobs to significant others.

Editor’s Note: Now more than halfway point of the college football season, The Sports Culture has taken the liberty to release its own premiere BCS ranking system . . . based on your school’s ugly ass cheerleaders.

Each team in the Pac-10, SEC, Big Ten and Big 12 will get their chance at earning your ranking.

Depending on where schools end up in their conference will depend on which slutty bowl they earn.

Welcome to the Big Ten Conference. Up next: basketball powerhouse Indiana!

Noteworthy: there was one former IU cheerleader who took nude photos that were leaked onto this great internet. That explains the random lingerie shots. So yes, naturally, we have selected her to be the face of IU.

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And you thought Ocho Cinco looked cool on your upper back:

After debating whether to begin with a tasteless Hellen Keller joke right out of the box, let’s get right to the unintentionally disastrous scenario in last night’s ASU-UCLA tackle football game:

Early second quarter, UCLA leads 3-0. The Sun Devils brought a solid blitz at Bruins quarterback Kevin Craft, who got a helmet clashed into the elbow. The hit poked the ball out of his hand at their own 20 yard line, which originally appeared to be an incomplete pass and dead ball.

Both teams let up and froze awaiting the next play. A mere moment after UCLA’s Derrick Coleman, a deaf tailback, picked up the seemingly dead ball, ASU’s Paul Unga slapped it out of Coleman’s hands and easily jogged into the endzone for a touchdown.

How that happened: Nobody blew the whistle, so Coleman didn’t realize the play was still live. And judging by the reactions from his teammates, who would’ve guessed otherwise?

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Sources close to the Oklahoma City Thunder basketball team have released this video.

The three people riding the couch suspended to this piece-of-shit car might possibly be part-time basketball players on the Thunder.

But after starting the season off 1-15, it’s not hard to guess that this is way more fun.

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