Kobe Bryant wasn’t in town to hear Shaq tell him to taste his ass. In fact, he wasn’t even in the country.

Right after the Lakers’ were smashed by the Celtics in the NBA Finals, Bryant and his family bolted to Cabo San Lucas to get away from the embarrassment, the media and the paparazzi.

The latter swooped in on shots of Kobe’s bootylicious wife, Vanessa, and Kobe taking pictures of her.

Katelyn Faber ain’t got nothin’ on Vanessa.

Click the jump for more photos of Kobe’s Wife.

Read more…

We all know Shaq doesn’t “give a shit” about what he says — that’s why we like him. But last night’s freestyle raps in NYC brought The Big Sahuaro from “Like it” to “Gotta Have it” on our Cold Stone Athlete Appreciation Scale.

The Phoenix Suns center was in the club spitting like he’s done before, but with a twist. He whipped out a freestyle rap aimed directly at his former teammate Kobe Bryant. He smiled often, even though he brought up the subject of Kobe destroying his marriage.

“I’m a horse, Kobe ratted me out, that’s why I’m getting divorced.”

This stems from a comment Kobe made right after he raped that white girl in Colorado.
Read more…

I’m getting a drift that people are sick of the NBA. So let’s span the globe for other PM delights.

• Harsh words over the airwaves: “We’ve done our homework on guys like Adam Dunn and there’s a reason why we don’t want Adam Dunn.” (National Post).
• Derek Jeter, most overrated player, according to new SI poll? (NY Daily News)
• That’s Kinda Fucked Up: Flip Saunders on a Wheaties box (Cuzoogle.com)
• SI assembles a cute list of the toughest things to do in sports. Funny thing is, “shutting down Kobe” is second on the list. Paul Pierce defies SI. (SI.com)
• As a college student at a big-time sports school, I’m always intrigued by other schools’ methods of student sections and student ticket distribution. Penn State’s might be the worst I’ve ever heard. (Daily Collegian)
• Must See: As if the beer belly wasn’t cool enough… how about… the WINE RACK!!! (Beer Belly Cooler)

Paul Pierce hammered Kobe Bryant on defense in the second half of Game 4.

Now, as the nightlife in Los Angeles begins to pick up on Thirsty Thursday, just a few hours after the big game, Kobe is getting hammered by shot glasses and a 36-pack of Bud Light.

Maybe in the process of his binge alcohol consumption, Kobe won’t choke the way his Lakers did with a 24-point lead in a pivotal Finals game.

Asked how he’ll will take the sting away: “Whine about it tonight,” Kobe said. “A lot of wine, a lot of beer. A couple shots; maybe like 20 of them. Digest it and get back to work tomorrow. ”

“Digest it?” Not even the heaviest Thirsty Thursday college frat boys could just “digest it” and make an 8 a.m. class on Friday morning.

Read more…

bel·i·chick·y adjective [bel-e-CHIK-ee] : an athletes’ or coaches’ bland, emotionless response to questions at press conferences, denying reporters any insight or valuable quotes; also : degrading the value (if any at all) of a press conference to absolutely zero.

“We don’t think about it too much, I’m sorry to be Belickicky. But we don’t think about it too much to be honest with you. It’s not something we focus on as players. Its more talked about outside of our circles more than it is inside.” — Kobe Bryant, founder, June 11, 2008 on NBA refs and calling fouls.

Belichicky : derived from legendary New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, after spending his career making awkward moments at press conferences with one-word answers.

Countries of origin: Los Angeles, California, United States. Boston, Massachusetts, United States.