Your first footage of the obligatory Boston post-championship riots sans the college kids:

Take note: Last night unveiled the latest fad, in 2008’s “Throw A ‘Do Not Enter’ Sign Into A Large Window Then Get The Fuck Out” technique to rioting, as seen in the first clip below. Not just once, but three times.

(Wait… what the fuck? Were those three signs shipped in from somewhere; or ordered on Amazon, and someone fucked up by clicking checkout three times? Did a group of people seriously hunt down three “Do Not Enter” signs and decide to torment one panel of glass? Was this a premeditated plan, set up days — if not months — ago using the Google Street Machine?

I need answers. Envision it now. “Yo Sully, let’s walk down Causeway and take down not one, not two, but THREE “Do Not Entah” signs … AND FUCKING POWAH THEM THROUGH THIS GLASS OVAH HERE!!! YANKEES SUCK!”)

And of course, 2004’s “Chant That Displays Hatred Towards The Other Team” model never get old, pioneered by the Kenmore Square after the ALCS. Whether it’s “Yankees Suck!” or “Beat LA!” the timeless three-syllable cheer is always fun for the whole family! (As seen below:)

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According to NBC Sports’ Buzzer Beater, which was filmed way before the Celtics won it all, Boston’s success throughout the playoffs was all a conspiracy. The hosts of the show, Matt Stroup — who looks like he’s 12 — and Tiffany Simons — who is surely to give Matt Stroup funny feelings in his pants — laid out four reasons as to why Boston had the advantage over Los Angeles.

1. Create a diversion using the Celtics Dancers.

It’s hard to tell whether Boston really has the advantage here, as we discussed with our Celtics Dancers/Laker Girls Scouting Report. Some say the Laker Girls are sexier and more distracting. Others say that a booty shaker clad in green causes more cases of A-D-D. It’s really a toss up. The winner of this diversion could go either way. Kinda like Tila Tequila.

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