Sorta strange how the second largest city in the United States doesn’t have a team from the country’s most popular sport.

Even Buffalo, Jacksonville and Minnesota have NFL teams. Those three cities can’t even combine to reach LA’s 12.9 million people, let alone attract famous people.

But by 2009, the city of angels will ‘no doubt’ have a professional football team, according to the Contra Costa times.

We’ve taken the liberty of coming up with a few names that are about as corny as the “you know you’re from [city] when” jokes:

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Quick flashback to 1998:

• Google looked really, really goofy. And so did CNN.
• Small trading cards were worth hundreds of dollars, just because of a holographic glow.
• AOL all but trademarked that deathly dial-up ring.
• Pre-teen instant messengers caught onto the LOL / LMAO / WTF / ROTFL / BRB craze.

Quick reflection on 2008:

• AOL is all but dead
• Joe Torre has finally caught onto the LOL / LMAO / WTF / ROTFL / BRB craze:

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Oh now we get it. Manny + Hollywood. But maybe West Hollywood actually does have a hardon?

Manny Ramirez, meet a town that has no problem with showing up late to games.

Welcome (officially) to La la land — a place that many Sox fans thought Manny spent most of his time mentally.

Ramirez will head west to a completely opposite city from Boston in a three-team deal that sends Jason Bay to the Sox from Pittsburgh.

The Sox will also pay $7 million — which doesn’t look half as bad as the Packers offering Favre $20 just to stay home — and include two bullpen duds, Craig Hansen and Brandon Moss.

So enjoy the West Coast, Manny. Crack open an avocado with Joe Torre. Grab an In-N-Out burger off the freeway. Grab a surf board and smoke a bowl. Get some fake boobs.

It’s a city that will embrace Manny Being Manny as just another day in Hollywood.

(No word on whether Pedro will join the LA-based 2003 Red Sox alumni association.)

At this point in time, anyone who knows even the slightest bit about sports knows what a historic rivalry the Boston Celtics and the Los Angeles Lakers make up. Magic vs. Bird is the old school matchup that no one will forget. Kobe vs. The Big Three is what’s hot today.

With Boston up 1-0 in the series and Game 2 on tap for tonight, let’s take a look at the matchups between some of the other current Lakers and Celtics. No, not the players, the girls. The Celtics Dancers square up against the ever-popular Lakers Girls. The Sports Culture scouted the girls using their online profiles, but it wasn’t as easy as it sounds. The Dancers practically pour their hearts out in their profiles, while the Lakers Girls reveal little about themselves. We’re not going to say it was unbearable, though.

That said, here’s the starting lineups:

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The Boston Celtics captured its first NBA Finals berth since before my birth.

Boston’s legendary tradition and history of 16 championships ended back in my father’s college era – a time well before high definition and TiVo.

None of today’s on demand mentality during the 80s, just a keg of beer and a small television of classic Celtics-Lakers.

Tomorrow night marks my generation’s first experience of such great tradition. We’ve grown up as a unique breed as underprivileged and brutally suffering Celtics fans.

For some, the Red Sox and Patriots combined five championships spoiled the New England fan base enough. Sure, I had seen a few parades by the time I finished high school, but deep down, the NBA Finals always lurked and intrigued my native Boston fan hood. (Personally, if the Sox and Pats never won again, but the Celtics continued a dynasty, I would be perfectly content – a drastically different mindset than most Sox bandwagoners.)

And now, it’s finally here. Something I’ve been waiting years to witness firsthand. Rather than spending countless hours on YouTube watching Bird, McHale and Russell, Tuesday night at 9 p.m. will forever lose my basketball relevance virginity.

But no. The front-runner soccer moms must voice their obnoxiously irrelevant take on anything that could ever affect their children.

“Oh my god 9 o’clock that’s way too late!”

Shut the hell up.

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