If you win the AL West, you receive permission to perform the over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder

The Dirty received a few photos of your American League West champs hanging out with their wangs out.

We guess winning the division a month ahead of schedule gives you time to grab random chicks’ tits when hanging out together. (At least, Mike Napoli took advantage of the situation)

Napoli, Jared Weaver, Lackey, and Adam Kennedy can also be seen below.

Rally Monkeys Unite!

Would you beat?

[ratings]

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As the injury reports would say, Highly doubtful

Props to Kevin for bringing up the joke this afternoon while freshmen women cooked us dinner. We’ll be road trippin’ to LA next weekend, and live blogging the whole six-hour drive, stops at casinos, Dbacks game Thursday, Dodgers game Friday, and UCLA-Zona game Saturday. (It would only be three hours if I drove the entire way.)

Manny Ramirez got a haircut between Wednesday’s and Thursday’s games against the Phillies but his barber was the one who cleaned up the best. Though Ramirez was “within the rules of cleaning it up a little bit,” according to Dodgers skipper Joe Torre, his locks still make him look like:

• The cousin of Medusa
• A Bob Marley imposter
• A dirty bum
• A damn woman

The weird thing is that Ramirez went hitless in the game after he cut his hair. This comes after Torre said: “He haunts me with this. He says every time he gets a hit, it’s the hair. I say it’s the ability.”

Maybe it’s the hair after all. But whatever it is, his barber is getting paid for doing very little work.

Bust open the tissue box, here are some of my favorite Manny moments:

*que that sad Titanic-esque music*

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According to NBC Sports’ Buzzer Beater, which was filmed way before the Celtics won it all, Boston’s success throughout the playoffs was all a conspiracy. The hosts of the show, Matt Stroup — who looks like he’s 12 — and Tiffany Simons — who is surely to give Matt Stroup funny feelings in his pants — laid out four reasons as to why Boston had the advantage over Los Angeles.

1. Create a diversion using the Celtics Dancers.

It’s hard to tell whether Boston really has the advantage here, as we discussed with our Celtics Dancers/Laker Girls Scouting Report. Some say the Laker Girls are sexier and more distracting. Others say that a booty shaker clad in green causes more cases of A-D-D. It’s really a toss up. The winner of this diversion could go either way. Kinda like Tila Tequila.

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At this point in time, anyone who knows even the slightest bit about sports knows what a historic rivalry the Boston Celtics and the Los Angeles Lakers make up. Magic vs. Bird is the old school matchup that no one will forget. Kobe vs. The Big Three is what’s hot today.

With Boston up 1-0 in the series and Game 2 on tap for tonight, let’s take a look at the matchups between some of the other current Lakers and Celtics. No, not the players, the girls. The Celtics Dancers square up against the ever-popular Lakers Girls. The Sports Culture scouted the girls using their online profiles, but it wasn’t as easy as it sounds. The Dancers practically pour their hearts out in their profiles, while the Lakers Girls reveal little about themselves. We’re not going to say it was unbearable, though.

That said, here’s the starting lineups:

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